Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!