I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
