Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize
