Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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