i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize