I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Randomize
