You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
