I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Randomize
