I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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