love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
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and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit