She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
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