I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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