And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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