she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
