How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
