I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
