break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize
