a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
This is my gift to your gina
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.