You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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