My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
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What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
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This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
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