Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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