found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
