After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
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There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
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Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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