we're blogging at a bar
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
