i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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