At least make sure they are 18
Why
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
