i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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