Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Randomize
