i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
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