I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize