You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
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