why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
