hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
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