i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
I understand Curling. That high.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Randomize
