i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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