do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
You can't just leave with hair like that
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
