You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Randomize
