Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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