At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
