she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
