So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
