you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
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