so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize