Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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