Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
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