i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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