just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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