The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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