let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
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