(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
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